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Noah Must've Needed a Big Damn Boat!

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By Philip Harmon
So I've got a kid on my staff that believes in a literal interpretation in the bible.  And oh all the things that I've heard lately that have completely assaulted my intelligence (and it's an election year, so there have been plenty of things), this is about the most outrageous.

Question: If evolution is a myth, then every animal on the planet at the present time would have had to have been on the planet way back when.  So, how in the holy hell did Noah get all those animals on a boat?  I mean, come on!  That would have to be one hell of a big boat.  And where'd he keep all the food?  And how come the animals didn't eat each other or Noah, for that matter? 

I'm sorry, but you have to be some kind of serious dimwit to believe the bible literally happened.  It boggles my mind that people like this really walk among us.  It scares me that people like this actually walk among us.  These are some pretty STUPID people!

That's why I put a picture of the raptors in this entry.  Obviously, Noah was smart enough to leave the raptors and the T-Rex's and the rest of the really big dinosaurs off the ark.  I'm sure that the raptors would have caused a few problems on the boat.

And another thing, are we assume that we keep our present consciousness when we die?  If not, then how in the hell do we know that we've made it to heaven.  If we can't keep our feeble minds the way they are right now, then I'm sure that whatever form we're in will not be able to comprehend where we are.  And who'd to assume that we even occupy another form in the first place?

The whole damn scam just seems rather flimsy.  But idiots like the kid I work with just eat it up with spoons and then ask for more.  Its no wonder so many people are dumbfounded at the number of fundamentalists these days.  We were supposed to be outgrowing such fairy tales.  We were supposed to be progressing.  And yet morons are still grasping to these tales.  And worse than that, they're still wanting to kill everyone who doesn't believe what they believe.  Talk about insecurity!  They're going to destroy this whole planet in the name of a fairy tale.

Well damn....

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