I'm sitting here with my two wonderful cats chewing on cold pizza and listening to some wonderful classical music. It is shaping up to be a nice, lazy Sunday night.
I looked thru the want adds again today. I always look forward to the Sunday edition of the classifieds, in hopes that maybe they'll have a job for me. And the thought of new jobs always strays towards the dreams of what could have been...
I wonder what I'd be like if...
I hadn't met Tina? Or Angie? Or if I'd stayed at College of Charleston? Or if I'd kept any of my previous jobs? Or if I never moved from Beaufort?
So many what ifs. And as I ponder my life, I am forced to accept the fact that I am a complete nobody. That, friends and neighbors, is a tough lesson to learn.
For the longest time I held on to a belief that things would somehow work themselves out and I'd end up on top. That's not to say that I'm down and out. It is to say that this is not where I thought I'd be at the age of 35. And the prospects are pretty dim that I'll be in much different a place anytime soon.
Again, it could be worse. But at this point in time I just like to be left the hell alone. And when I win the HGTV Dream Home and move to the Florida keys, my dream will come true. I can drop out and live the quiet, boring life that I'm looking for...
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